There may come a time in your life where you break down. A time where you find yourself wondering why this is happening, and asking why it has to happen. You may be angry, confused and hurt in ways that you didn't know were possible. There might be moments where you feel sheer terror at what might happen as your mind frantically tries to find a way out.
In those mere moments when the emotions are too much and the dark thoughts and worries almost consume you, it's hard to see your way. You might think to pray, to again ask why this is happening to you. Was it something that you did? Is it something that you need to learn from? How could this possibly be something that you need to go through?
It's likely that while you're trying to pray you can't find the words to start with. The emotional weight and sorrow feel never ending. But the rapid thoughts and feelings will slow down. Soon you'll be able to think clearly, and communicate with our Heavenly Father in a very raw and vulnerable way. As you poor out your very soul to Him, he listens.
He is there. He hears you, and He loves you.
I know what that feels like.
Months have gone by this past year where I had no idea what I was doing. I wasn't even aware that I had no idea what I was doing. I remember during those months asking Heavenly Father to help me to know my Savior better. I knew that he suffered and died for my sins. I know that he lives. But I don't think I knew HIM.
I have been overwhelmed with His spirit this morning and all I wanted to do was write. I can't explain how it took this ongoing trial to bring me closer to my Savior, but it has. It has! I may not understand yet the full extent of why it is happening and I certainly have a long way to go before I am healed.
But now I KNOW that he is with me every single baby step of my way.
The hymn "I Know That My Redeemer Lives" has always been one of my favorites. But today, here in the middle of my little living floor where I have been praying, I feel like I've heard it for the first time.
"I know that my Redeemer lives. What comfort this sweet sentence gives! He lives, He lives, who once was dead. He lives, my ever-living Head. He lives to bless me with his love. He lives to plead for me above. He lives my hungry soul to feed. He lives to bless in time of need."
Just knowing the simple truth that my Savior lives is truly precious. He was dead and rose again! He wants to bless me with his love, he pleads for me above. He is my biggest support and advocate.
"He lives to grant me rich supply. He lives to guide me with his eye. He lives to comfort me when faint. he lives to hear my sou'l complaint. He lives to silence all my fears. He lives to wipe away my tears. He lives to calm my troubled heart. He lives all blessings to impart."
He is always with me, always guiding me. He gives me strength when I have none. He has such love for me that he waits for me to come to him with my complaints, and my sorrows. He is always there. He has already done so much for me, knowing that he is STILL there for me is incredible.
"He lives, my kind, wise heavenly Friend. He lives and loves me to the end. He lives, and while he lives, I'll sing. He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King. He lives and grants me daily breath. He lives, and I shall conquer death. He lives my mansion to prepare. He lives to bring me safely there."
He is my closest friend. He is my big brother. He watches over me and protects me. He is the very air I breathe! Because of Him, I will have eternal life with my Heavenly Father. He patiently waits and guides us through our lives until we are safely in his arms again!
"He lives! All glory to his name! He lives, my Savior, still the same. Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives: 'I know that my Redeemer lives!' He lives! All glory to his name! He lives, my Savior still the same. Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives: 'I know that my redeemer lives!"
All glory, to Jesus Christ my Savior. He is STILL the same, he is eternal!